Fear doesn’t have the final say.
I recently listened to an excerpt from an interview with Alex Honnold the climber famous for his free solo completion of El Capitan. In the documentary surrounding his free solo attempt, there was a scene where they did a scan of his brain (or amygdala, specifically) to observe his reaction to fear stimuli. He didn’t have the same fear response as others would. I recall thinking something like “yeah that’s why he can do these extraordinary things - his brain’s different.”. Back to the interview clip - Alex made the point that it’s not that his brain is any different. It’s the many years of exposure to genuinely scary things. He knew perfectly well that he was safe sitting in an office getting his brain scanned. He stated that exposure to fear can put normally stressful life experiences (he used the example of an airport) in perspective.
One of the most scary things that I can imagine is being caught in an avalanche. I watched a short documentary about a woman named Sanne Mona who survived an avalanche. It was such an out-of-body experience for her that, during the avalanche, she said that she could hear someone screaming to eventually realize that the person screaming was her. She struggled to keep back the emotions as she discussed the event. She continues to ski. She had to take steps like skiing benign terrain with her dog running along with her. She also got counseling. She stated in the documentary that it was a “Who’s going to win situation. Is the fear going to win or am I going to win. … I couldn’t let it win.”.
I don’t share the above because I can personally relate to those experiences; but because I can try to learn from what those individuals are teaching us about fear. I am going to share my own little fun experience, though.
I recently tried top rope rock climbing. I’ve been attracted to rock climbing for a long time never thinking that I was “cool” enough to do anything but bouldering (don’t get me wrong - bouldering is super cool). I didn’t think that I’d be brave enough to do anything where you had to use a rope and harness. I don’t know what finally prompted me to do it but I registered for a rock climbing class last August. It was about a three hour drive that morning to get to the class meeting place and I remember praying on the trip up there that I’d be able to do it. I didn’t know if having the harness or helmet on would trigger panic and I’d be unable to even start. I really did not know if I’d be able to do it. Only once did I ever really have any real amount of panic and I was able to get over it quickly. I visualized fear as not something that was non-existent but, instead, as it having its own compartment in my brain and that is where it was to stay. In some ways, I don’t really understand why I was so afraid. Now I wonder what my limits are. I hired a guide for an additional half day of climbing. We didn’t do anything really tall but it was so fun. I had a little fear but was able to top both routes. I am eagerly looking forward to climbing again and hope to conquer something a bit more challenging. If I hadn’t tried, I’d still have the belief that rock climbing cliffs is something that I probably can’t do. Now I get to wonder what I can do. I’m not fearless but I hope to continue to improve. A new avenue of life is now open to me.
Is there something that you gravitate to that scares you? Is it rock climbing? Is it going to a gym? Is it entering a race? I ask you to consider this - What if you do it and like it? What if you do it and it’s super hard but you feel proud of yourself for doing it? What if you hate it but are glad that you did it because it aligns with who you want to be as a person? What if you don’t actually know your limits?
It is good and healthy to take a moment to question our beliefs. Sometimes, I think that it is hardest to question our limiting beliefs… especially when we can’t imagine not being too afraid to do something. Are we going to let the fear win?
I would love to hear your success stories, and I’m here if you need someone to cheer you on.
Love,
Your Coach Martha
Documentary mentioned: Finding Joy After an Avalanche | Mountain of Angels Ep.1: THE SURVIVOR https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yU2Gss1Q6jM